Awareness – Page 2 – Life Lessons

Why are Men Intimidated by Alpha Females?

My definition of an alpha female is one who exudes a striking confidence based on strength, values, purpose, and priorities. Her caliber, intellect, and acumen score high on the quality chart. Dictionary.com describes the alpha female as “a powerful and successful woman , often in a leadership role. Alpha females are often described as intimidating by men and women alike.”

Aptitude + Attitude = Alpha

An alpha is not just a persona. It’s an attitude. Her demeanor is formidable, and her presence alone speaks volume. You can be a very successful and powerful CEO of a company getting abused or bullied by your significant other at home. Hence, that social strength and ability must transcend across multiple facets of life to be deemed an alpha female.

Titles such as queen, diva, baddie, or boss don’t make you alpha either, especially if you’re not living up to it. You are the one who can catch yourself when you fall (strength). You are the one who wants a man for companionship and love but does not need him to pay your bills (values). You are the one who finds your niche instead of a job (purpose). And you are the one who does not mix business with pleasure (priorities). All these traits make you powerful and successful, not just your job title or social status. You’re a leader in every role you play in life.

Why some males are intimidated by you?

The main reason could be that he may have insecurities. A woman of your caliber may make him feel insignificant and unworthy. When you make bread and are a winner, you’re a double threat. When you combine that with wanting him but not needing him, you become a triple threat. Your recipe is too strong for his taste because he feels as though he cannot complement you. Your strengths and abilities highlight his weaknesses and make him feel inferior. He may actually be your match, but your energy intimidates him. Your kind are usually unapproachable and impatient. Thus, his pickup line needs to be direct, original, and concise.

Alpha females, you don’t have to reduce yourself or lower your standards to find love. As long as he meets your requirements, learn to accept him at his current level, foster his plan, support his goals, let him lead, and provide guidance as needed. Most importantly, make him feel needed regardless if he’s a white or blue collar worker.

Qualified fellas, don’t let fear cause you to miss out on a great opportunity. She’s only protecting her throne. But make sure you rehearse those lines before bringing them to her table, and show no signs of weakness. Otherwise, she will surely reject you. Lastly, don’t be afraid to approach her in your work uniform because that is evidence that you are employed and socially responsible. If you can make her laugh or smile, that’s a plus!

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topic suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.

Photo: Flickr by Ria Ledevre

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I’m Fake All Day, But My Tears Are Real

Don’t be fooled by a person’s social media posts. It appears that most of us do not wear our hearts on our sleeves. I’m actually glad many of us don’t because some people’s posts would be so depressing. However, one needs a dose of good and bad to sustain a healthy living. What I mean is seeing that others might have it worst than you can make you appreciate your current situation.

People tend to fake like their happy, fake like their in a relationship, fake like their balling, and even fake like their in a profession that they’re not. Everyone who wears scrubs is not a nurse. Just as everyone who works with kids is not a school teacher. You can’t keep believing everything you see, then go wining to your husband or boyfriend of how you’d like your life to be. Most of the time, you might be happier than they are in your current situation.

Truth is, no one is one hundred percent happy all the time. People just don’t like to admit it. Happiness is a temporary feeling spawned by a favorable gesture, person, thing, or event. People are not happy when their loved one passes. People are usually not happy after a bad break-up or ugly divorce. People are not happy when their teenagers are out of control. People are not happy when they lose their jobs. People are not happy after having a car repossessed or foreclosing on a home. People are not happy after filing bankrupt. People are not quite happy when they’re flat broke. As you can see, there are several instances in life that can make one unhappy.

So before you begin to relish in other’s misfortunes, think about the times in life when you weren’t happy. Yeah, they’re posts might be fraudulent, but their tears are real. Some people yearn for attention and turn to social media for it. That might not be your approach, but it’s their way of coping with life. Maybe they are imagining themselves in a better situation with the hope of being in a better situation some day. We all do that at some point in life, just not on social media.

Remember, happiness is momentarily. When people look happy, they just might be – at the moment. Social media gives people another way of expressing their happiness, so let them be. In a world of cruelty and injustice, I love to see people smiling and enjoying life, even if they are faking it. Misery loves company and invites the most sinister behaviors. I’d rather view fake posts all day than some of the negativity I see getting glorified on social media.

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topic suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.

Something captured your interest? Don’t be selfish. Share with your friends!

When You Know Better, You Do Better

It’s easy to criticize and judge the character of a lost soul, when making wise choices come easy for you. People come from different walks of life, struggles, and hardships. How you deal with your pain and disappointment might be different from that of your brother’s or sister’s. I certainly agree that malign behavior should be punishable by law – no doubt. Nonetheless, I believe all people were born innocent before being corrupted by the world. That’s why rehabilitation programs are prevailing across the country. Otherwise, more jails would be overcrowded with people who weren’t given a second chance.

I used to judge people who did not have similar morals or values as myself. I didn’t think I was better than them, but I knew I made better choices. I believe we were all born with equal potential and abilities. I could never assume that I am better than another individual when all it takes is one bad decision to gain a new identity and an unfair stigma. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s just that some of us get caught. Many of us do things intentionally and try to call it a mistake, once we are caught. As long as you grow from your mistakes or nefarious intentions, you too deserve a second chance.

Heartfelt testimonies, stories, and accounts of people’s lives have drastically increased my awareness of behavior challenges stunting personal growth and development. How is a child who has been beaten all his or her life supposed to function normally in society? How is a girl who was robbed of her innocence supposed to have trust in men? What does a boy introduced to drug dealing at an early age know about having a regular job? What does a man born to a pimp know about respecting women? What do the motherless and fatherless know about togetherness?

Some people were born into abuse, misuse, neglect, and dysfunction. Until someone directs them to the light at the end of the tunnel, they are forever in darkness and despair. You do have to make the change on your own, but someone or something has to spark a desire for you to change. Everyone has an opportunity to minister to someone at some point in life. You never know what a short, positive conversation can do for a person. It is okay to criticize, as long as you do so constructively, but don’t just sit back and judge that person as if your past is squeaky clean.

If you have a gift for encouraging, inspiring, or motivating people, use it. Sometimes, that’s all people need. If you have an awakening story or experience that might relate to what a person’s enduring, don’t be ashamed or embarrassed to share. Your testimony might lift the burden of fear and doubt. That’s why groups are formed for former alcoholics, battered women, convicts, etc. No one can relate better than a person who has had a similar experience. In groups, ideas on how to cope with certain situations are exchanged and a person’s battles/concerns are heard with considerable attention.

For every sad, sorry, or sinful individual who lost his or her way, there’s a hero just one conversation away. Make it your daily assignment to ignite someone with a positive voice. You might prevent someone from becoming a statistic.

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topic suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.

Photo 1: Flickr. Smoking by NunoFernandsDavid

Something captured your interest? Don’t be selfish. Share with your friends!