When You Know Better, You Do Better



It’s easy to criticize and judge the character of a lost soul, when making wise choices come easy for you. People come from different walks of life, struggles, and hardships. How you deal with your pain and disappointment might be different from that of your brother’s or sister’s. I certainly agree that malign behavior should be punishable by law – no doubt. Nonetheless, I believe all people were born innocent before being corrupted by the world. That’s why rehabilitation programs are prevailing across the country. Otherwise, more jails would be overcrowded with people who weren’t given a second chance.

I used to judge people who did not have similar morals or values as myself. I didn’t think I was better than them, but I knew I made better choices. I believe we were all born with equal potential and abilities. I could never assume that I am better than another individual when all it takes is one bad decision to gain a new identity and an unfair stigma. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s just that some of us get caught. Many of us do things intentionally and try to call it a mistake, once we are caught. As long as you grow from your mistakes or nefarious intentions, you too deserve a second chance.

Heartfelt testimonies, stories, and accounts of people’s lives have drastically increased my awareness of behavior challenges stunting personal growth and development. How is a child who has been beaten all his or her life supposed to function normally in society? How is a girl who was robbed of her innocence supposed to have trust in men? What does a boy introduced to drug dealing at an early age know about having a regular job? What does a man born to a pimp know about respecting women? What do the motherless and fatherless know about togetherness?

Some people were born into abuse, misuse, neglect, and dysfunction. Until someone directs them to the light at the end of the tunnel, they are forever in darkness and despair. You do have to make the change on your own, but someone or something has to spark a desire for you to change. Everyone has an opportunity to minister to someone at some point in life. You never know what a short, positive conversation can do for a person. It is okay to criticize, as long as you do so constructively, but don’t just sit back and judge that person as if your past is squeaky clean.

If you have a gift for encouraging, inspiring, or motivating people, use it. Sometimes, that’s all people need. If you have an awakening story or experience that might relate to what a person’s enduring, don’t be ashamed or embarrassed to share. Your testimony might lift the burden of fear and doubt. That’s why groups are formed for former alcoholics, battered women, convicts, etc. No one can relate better than a person who has had a similar experience. In groups, ideas on how to cope with certain situations are exchanged and a person’s battles/concerns are heard with considerable attention.

For every sad, sorry, or sinful individual who lost his or her way, there’s a hero just one conversation away. Make it your daily assignment to ignite someone with a positive voice. You might prevent someone from becoming a statistic.

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topic suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.




Photo 1: Flickr. Smoking by NunoFernandsDavid

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What’s Holding You Back?



There are myriad reasons people do not fulfill their dreams, other than some disabilities or incarceration. The main reason is that people never turn those dreams into goals. A dream is just a dream, until your turn it into a goal. You have to use whatever’s holding you back as an impetus to take the next step. In an effort to trigger the alarm, I will give you a few scenarios and viable solutions for each one.

Scenario #1 – I Have Kids
Kids should never hold you back because they are a blessing in itself. They should be the main reason you grind as hard as you do and make certain sacrifices. I know you’re probably sacrificing your own dreams to make theirs come true. Maybe you’re doing it just to provide for them. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. You should. However, if you have to wait until your kids to get out of the house (which can be a very long time, depending on their ages), you may want to consider a flexible source for supplementing your income.

The most flexible way of earning extra money is by working from home. Turn your hobby into your business. If you like styling hair, start charging. If you like doing party favors, turn that favor into a paid opportunity. If you like talking on the phone, telemarketing companies are always hiring. If you like to bake, sweet teeth are not hard to find. You may be surrounded by them daily.

You don’t have to wait until the kids get out of the house to go back to school. You can take the money you’ve raised with your talent and pay for one class at a time. If you earn a handsome refund check each year, you could use a portion of it to pay for your classes. In that way, you won’t have to feel pressured to attend school full time and incur undesirable debt.

Colleges understand your situation as well. That’s why they offer online courses. By the time your kids graduate, so will you. Geez! I wish I would have thought of that when my kids were little.

Scenario #2 – I Work Full-Time
That’s awesome! Several of the unemployed are seeking that opportunity as well. But how are you using your breaks and downtime at work? Are you Facebooking or Tweeting? Are you smoking or chatting? Those are definitely things you should do on your breaks, but you could be making better use of your time.

If you are going to Facebook, search for groups that have like interests. You could gather much information and network at the same time.

Instead of tweeting, visit LinkedIn for business or career opportunities. You can build a professional profile that might capture the eye of a preferred employer.

If you’re a smoker, then you probably have more breaks than the average employee. Instead of lighting a cigarette, light your torch of intelligence by brainstorming ways to fulfill your destiny. Escape that dangerous habit, and get in the habit of exercising your mind instead of frying your lungs.

If you love to talk, initiate career-focused discussions with people who are a few steps ahead of you. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and seek solutions. You’ll find that many people who have it together love talking about themselves and offering good advice.

Scenario #3 – I Don’t Have Transportation
Ask for it. You call on your friends and relatives for anything else. Fill their gas tanks each week, and they probably won’t mind. With spiking gas prices, that’s not a bad deal. Don’t say you don’t have the money. You would have to put it in your own car, if you had one. If you really can’t pay for gas, then offer a service. Bartering is a good business practice.

Of course, you can always catch the bus or train, if you don’t have gas money. Ride a bike or walk, if it’s close by. I’m sure you could use the exercise.

Scenario #4 – I Don’t Have The Money
Apply for grants and/or loans. If you are ineligible, now would be a good time to use your gifts and talents. You can do anything you put your mind to.

If all else fails, get a second job and save at least ten percent of each paycheck. If you can, you should save it all. After all, it is extra income.

Scenario #5 – I Just Don’t Have Time
Yes you do. We all have time for what we want to make time for. Budget your time wisely, and invest in yourself.

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topic suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.




Photo: Flickr. Chain by Kamil PorembinskiCC

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Do It Now



If there is something you really want to do, don’t wait until tomorrow. Do it now. One day, I was having a short conversation with one of my best friends. The conversations with her were always short because she worked one full time job, one part time, and attended school full time, while raising two young girls on her own. Nevertheless, she made time to chat with me while in route to or from one of her jobs or school. Thinking about a typical day for my friend sparked something in me. I thought to myself, “If she’s able to work two jobs and take care of two little girls and still go back to school, what’s stopping me?” At the time, I had only one full time job, four kids, and a husband to help me out. I had so much down time at work that I found myself on social networks, browsing the Internet, and shopping. I knew I could have been making better use of my down time, but I just didn’t know how. Thus, I left a message for an enrollment counselor at the University of Phoenix to call me back. I didn’t receive a call back the first time, so after a second attempt, I was able to reach someone. The enrollment counselor asked me a few questions before explaining my options. He had me all pumped up and excited but nervous at the same time. I had been out of school for a while, and the last time I was enrolled, I failed terribly.

Prior to speaking with the enrollment counselor at Phoenix, I was denied financial assistance the last time I attempted to go back to school in 2004. I think I had sort of given up at that point because I knew I could not afford to pay out of pocket. One rejection set me back by four years because I didn’t fight for it. Anyhow, my goal was to start back in the spring of 2009, but the enrollment counselor talked me into starting right away. At first, I was kind of mad that I let him talk me into starting right away, but I was grateful in the end. I probably would have come up with a million and one excuses as to why I could not start in the January 2009.

On September 30, 2008, I became a college student once again. On June 2, 2012, I became a college graduate! Walking across that stage was one of the best feelings I’ve ever experienced. I have absolutely no regrets! So what are you waiting for? The right time is now! I could have been still sitting in that cubicle at work on social networks and shopping, but instead, I used that time wisely and pursued a degree online…while on the clock. That was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made at the expense of my employer. So whether you want to go back to school, start a business, or buy some property, don’t procrastinate…do it now!

And remember…
“Make sense of what you do, and make every cent count.”

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Submit topics suggestions using the “Contact Me” page.




Photo. Flickr. There are times of QC failures by Markus Bahlmann

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